Return-path: Envelope-to: scoffey@novavision.com Delivery-date: Mon, 21 May 2001 15:01:49 +0100 Received: from pc741.as1.galway1.eircom.net ([159.134.146.229] helo=nova3.novavision.com) by brockman.tinet.ie with smtp (Exim 2.05 #23) id 151qFf-0006N5-00 for scoffey@novavision.com; Mon, 21 May 2001 15:01:40 +0100 Message-ID: <009601c0e1fe$43fef8e0$3100000a@novavision.com> From: "Fiona Clarke" To: "Sean Coffey" Subject: Fw: FW: FW: FW: These are very good! jokes Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 14:59:33 +0100 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_0093_01C0E206.A56F7480" X-Priority: 3 X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 5.50.4133.2400 X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V5.50.4133.2400 This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ------=_NextPart_000_0093_01C0E206.A56F7480 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="Windows-1252" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable ----- Original Message -----=20 From: claire diver=20 To: margaret@cosmon.ie=20 Cc: adelenegreene@yahoo.co.uk ; bron@ireland.com ; = fclarke@novavision.com ; james_mac_donncha@hotmail.com ; = kkenny007@hotmail.com ; colllouise@hotmail.com ; = Mark.Hedderman@customhousegroup.com ; paraic_de_paor@hotmail.com ; = roisinod62@hotmail.com ; sarahlowther@hotmail.com ; mucser69@yahoo.com ; = tanya003@gofree.indigo.ie=20 Sent: Monday, May 21, 2001 12:54 PM Subject: Fwd: FW: FW: FW: These are very good! jokes >From: "Sharon Jordan" >Reply-To: >To: "Carmel. Obrien" >CC: "Tim O'Brien" , "Olga Craig" =20 >, "Lorraine" , =20 >"Kathleen Mc Goldrick" , "Julie = Devereux" =20 >, "I Daly" , "H Kiernan" = >, "Fiona Hanratty" = ,=20 > "Eoghan Kiernan" , "Dward" =20 >, "Claire Diver" >Subject: FW: FW: FW: These are very good! jokes >Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 12:44:35 +0100 > > > >-----Original Message----- >From: Hunt, Alan (Dublin) [mailto:HuntAla@exchange.ie.ml.com] >Sent: 21 May 2001 12:23 >To: 'mgunning@invesco.ie'; 'declanw@access.com.au'; 'ollieh@indigo.ie'; >'pmcniff@tassoftware.ie'; 'sjordan@tassoftware.ie' >Subject: FW: FW: FW: These are very good! jokes > > > > > >Subject: Fwd:FW: FW: These are very good! (fwd) > > > > > > > > > > >A small boy walks into his mother's room and catches > > > > her topless. "Mommy, mommy, what are those?" he says > > > >pointing to her breasts. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > "Well, son," she says. These are ballons, and > > > >when > > > > >> > you die, they inflate and float you up to > > > >heaven." > > > > >> > > > > > >> > Incredibly, he appears to believe this > > > >explanation > > > > >> > and goes off quite satisfied. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > Two days later. While his mother is making tea, > > > >he > > > > >> > rushes into the kitchen. > > > > >> > "Mommy, mommy, Aunt Eliza is dying!!" > > > > >> > > > > > >> > "What do you mean?" asks his mother. > > > > >> > > > > > >> > "Well, she's out in the garden shed, lying on the > > > > >> > floor. Both of her ballons are out, Dad's blowing > > > >them up, and she > > > >keeps > > > > >> > yelling, 'GOD, I'm coming! GOD I'm coming!'" > > > >************************************************* > > > > > > > > > >A mother and young son were flying Aer > > > > > Lingus. > > > > > > The son,who had been > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> looking out the plane's > > > > > window, > > > > > > turned to his mother > > > > > > and > > > > > > > > > > > > said > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Mom ... If big dogs have > > > > > baby > > > > > > dogs and big cats have > > > > > > baby > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> cats, why don't > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> big planes have baby > > > > > planes?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Stumped for an answer the > > > > > mother > > > > > > suggested to her son > > > > > > that > > > > > > > > > > > > he > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> ask the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> stewardess. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The boy promptly got out > > > > > of his > > > > > > seat and wandered back > > > > > > to > > > > > > > > > > > > the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> service area. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Excuse me" the boy said > > > > > to the > > > > > > stewardess. "If big > > > > > > dogs > > > > > > > > > > > > have > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> baby dogs and > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> big cats have baby cats, > > > > > why > > > > > > don't big planes have > > > > > > baby > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> planes?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Did your mother tell you > > > > > to ask > > > > > > me that?" "Yes" He > > > > > > said > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> nodding his head. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> She whispered in the boy's > > > > > ear, > > > > > > "Tell your mother it's > > > > > > > > > > > > > because > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Aer Lingus > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> always pulls out on time." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >=20 > = >----------------------------------------------------------------------- > > >- > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> ---- > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> --- > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The parish priest needs > > > > > his house > > > > > > painted so he offers > > > > > > the > > > > > > > > > > > > job > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> to one of his > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> altar boys. The first day > > > > > the kid > > > > > > paints the entire > > > > > > inside > > > > > > > > > > > > of > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> the house, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> he's sweating like hell > > > > > but > > > > > > eventually gets it > > > > > > finished. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The priest commends him on > > > > > the > > > > > > work and with a > > > > > > flourish > > > > > > > > > > > > hands > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> him 50p. The > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> boy looks at the coin and > > > > > says to > > > > > > the priest "Thanks > > > > > > very > > > > > > > > > > > > much > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Father, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> you're a virgin". > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The priest is a bit > > > > > startled but > > > > > > makes no remark. Next > > > > > > day > > > > > > > > > > > > the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> boy has to > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> paint the outside of the > > > > > house; > > > > > > it's a really hot day > > > > > > and > > > > > > > > > > > > he > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> just manages to > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> finish the job without > > > > > > collapsing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The priest looks at the > > > > > job and > > > > > > this time gives the > > > > > > lad a > > > > > > > > > > > > > pound > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> coin. Once > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> again the lad looks at the > > > > > coin > > > > > > and says "Thanks very > > > > > > much > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Father,you really > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> are a virgin". > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> At this stage the priest > > > > > decides > > > > > > to take action. > > > > > > "Tommy," > > > > > > > > > > > > he > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> says,"that's > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> twice you called me a > > > > > virgin. Do > > > > > > you have any idea > > > > > > what > > > > > > > > > > > > the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> word means?". > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Yes" says the brat,"a > > > > > tight > > > > > > c*nt" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >******************************************************* > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Little Johnny in Love > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The pretty teacher was > > > > > concerned > > > > > > with one of her > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> eleven-year-old students. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Taking him aside after > > > > > class one > > > > > > day,she asked, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Little Johnny, why has > > > > > your > > > > > > school work been so poor > > > > > > > > > > > > lately?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "I'm in love," the boy > > > > > replied. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Holding back an urge to > > > > > smile, > > > > > > she asked, "With whom?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "With YOU!" he said. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "But Johnny," she said > > > > > gently, > > > > > > "don't you see how > > > > > > silly > > > > > > > > > > > > that > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> is? It's true > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> that I would like a > > > > > husband of my > > > > > > own someday. But I > > > > > > don't > > > > > > > > > > > > > want > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> a child." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Oh, don't worry," the boy > > > > > said > > > > > > reassuringly, "I'll > > > > > > use a > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> rubber!" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >*************************************************************** > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> *** > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The makers of Fairy Liquid > > > > > are > > > > > > set to release a new > > > > > > advert > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> based in Dublin's > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Northside. A similar ad > > > > > will run > > > > > > in Limerick. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> It goes like this: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Little Boy: "Mammy why are > > > > > your > > > > > > hands so soft"? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Mother: "Because I'm > > > > > twelve" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >************************************************************ > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Sons > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Four men went golfing one > > > > > day. > > > > > > Three of them headed to > > > > > > the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> first tee and the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> fourth went into the > > > > > clubhouse to > > > > > > make some calls. The > > > > > > > > > > > > three > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> men started > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> talking, bragging about > > > > > their > > > > > > sons.The first man told > > > > > > the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> others, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "My son is a homebuilder > > > > > and he > > > > > > is so successful that > > > > > > he > > > > > > > > > > > > gave > > > > > > > > > > > > > a > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> friend a new > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> home for free." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The second man said, "My > > > > > son was > > > > > > a car salesman and > > > > > > now he > > > > > > > > > > > > > owns > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> a multi-line > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> dealership. He's so > > > > > successful > > > > > > that he gave a friend a > > > > > > new > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Mercedes > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> convertible, fully > > > > > loaded." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The third man bragged, "My > > > > > son is > > > > > > a stockbroker and > > > > > > he's > > > > > > > > > > > > doing > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> so well that > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> he gave his friend an > > > > > entire > > > > > > stock portfolio." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The fourth man joined them > > > > > on the > > > > > > tee after a few > > > > > > minutes. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The first man said, "We > > > > > were just > > > > > > talking about our > > > > > > sons. > > > > > > > > > > > > How > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> is yours > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> doing?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The fourth man replied, > > > > > "Well, my > > > > > > son is gay and > > > > > > dances in > > > > > > > > > > > > a > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> gay bar. I'm > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> not totally thrilled about > > > > > the > > > > > > dancing job, but he > > > > > > must be > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> doing good. His > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> last three boyfriends gave > > > > > him a > > > > > > house, a brand new > > > > > > > > > > > > Mercedes, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> and a stock > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> portfolio. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >************************************************************** > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> There was this couple that > > > > > was > > > > > > married for 20 years, > > > > > > and > > > > > > > > > > > > every > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> time they had > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> s*x the husband always > > > > > insisted > > > > > > on shutting off the > > > > > > > > > > > > lights. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Well, after 20 > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> years the wife felt this > > > > > was > > > > > > stupid. She figured she > > > > > > would > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> break him out of > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> the crazy habit. So one > > > > > night, > > > > > > while they were in the > > > > > > > > > > > > middle > > > > > > > > > > > > > of > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> doing it, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> she turned on the lights. > > > > > She > > > > > > looked down and saw her > > > > > > > > > > > > husband > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> was holding a > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> dildo. She got really > > > > > upset. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "You impotent b*stard," > > > > > she > > > > > > screamed at him, "how > > > > > > could > > > > > > > > > > > > you be > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> lying to me > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> all of these years? You > > > > > better > > > > > > explain yourself!" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The husband looks her > > > > > straight in > > > > > > the eyes and says, > > > > > > > > > > > > calmly, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "I'll explain > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> the dildo.......If you can > > > > > > explain our three kids." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >******************************************************** > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> One day Jane met Tarzan in > > > > > the > > > > > > jungle. She was very > > > > > > > > > > > > attracted > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> to him and, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> during her questions about > > > > > his > > > > > > life, she asked him how > > > > > > he > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> managed for s*x. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "What's that?" he asked. > > > > > She > > > > > > explained to him what s*x > > > > > > > > > > > > was, > > > > > > > > > > > > > and > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> he said, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Oh,Tarzan use hole in > > > > > trunk of > > > > > > tree." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Horrified, she said, > > > > > "Tarzan you > > > > > > have that all wrong! > > > > > > I > > > > > > > > > > > > will > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> show you how to > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> do it properly." She took > > > > > off her > > > > > > clothes, lay down on > > > > > > the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> ground, and > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> spread her legs wide. > > > > > "Here," she > > > > > > said, pointing, "You > > > > > > > > > > > > must > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> put it in > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> here." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Tarzan removed his > > > > > loincloth, > > > > > > stepped closer and then > > > > > > gave > > > > > > > > > > > > her > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> an almighty > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> kick in the crotch. Jane > > > > > rolled > > > > > > around in agony. > > > > > > > > > > > > Eventually > > > > > > > > > > > > > she > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> managed to > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> gasp, "Why the hell did > > > > > you do > > > > > > that?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "Tarzan check for bees!" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >*************************************************************** > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> * > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> 10 Times Bigger > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> The 10th grade teacher > > > > > asks > > > > > > Jessica: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "What part of the human > > > > > body > > > > > > increases to 10 times > > > > > > it's > > > > > > > > > > > > normal > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> size when > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> excited?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Jessica responds: "That's > > > > > > disgusting! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> I don't have to answer > > > > > that > > > > > > question!" So the teacher > > > > > > asks > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> little Johnny, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> who responds: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "That's easy...the pupil > > > > > of the > > > > > > eye." "That's correct, > > > > > > > > > > > > Johnny. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Very good!" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> And turning to Jessica, > > > > > she says: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> "I've three things to say > > > > > to you, > > > > > > young lady... first, > > > > > > you > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> didn't do your > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> homework; second, you have > > > > > a > > > > > > dirty mind; and third, > > > > > > you're > > > > > > > > > > > > in > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> for a big > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> disappointment!" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >*************************************************************** > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> *** > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Weighed??? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Joe took his blind date to > > > > > the > > > > > > carnival. "What would > > > > > > you > > > > > > > > > > > > like > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> to do first, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Kim?" asked Joe. "I want > > > > > to get > > > > > > weighed," she said. > > > > > > They > > > > > > > > > > > > > ambled > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> over to the > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> weight guesser. He guessed > > > > > 120 > > > > > > pounds. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> She got on the scale; it > > > > > read 117 > > > > > > and she won a > > > > > > prize.b > > > > > > > > > > > > Next > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> the couple went > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> on the ferris wheel. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> When the ride was over, > > > > > Joe again > > > > > > asked Kim what she > > > > > > would > > > > > > > > > > > > > like > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> to do. "I > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> want to get weighed," she > > > > > said. > > > > > > Back to the weight > > > > > > guesser > > > > > > > > > > > > > they > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> went. Since > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> they had been there > > > > > before, he > > > > > > guessed her correct > > > > > > weight, > > > > > > > > > > > > and > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Joe lost his > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> dollar. The couple walked > > > > > around > > > > > > the carnival and > > > > > > again he > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> asked where to > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> next. "I want to get > > > > > weighed," > > > > > > she responded. By this > > > > > > > > > > > > time, > > > > > > > > > > > > > Joe > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> figured she > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> was really weird and took > > > > > her > > > > > > home early, dropping her > > > > > > off > > > > > > > > > > > > > with > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> a handshake. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Her roommate, Laura, asked > > > > > her > > > > > > about the blind date, > > > > > > > > > > > > "How'd it > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> go?" > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> Kim responded, "Oh, Waura, > > > > > it was > > > > > > wousy." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >=20 >________________________________________________________________________= _ > > Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at=20 >http://www.hotmail.com. > > > _________________________________________________________________________= Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at = http://www.hotmail.com. ------=_NextPart_000_0093_01C0E206.A56F7480 Content-Type: text/html; charset="Windows-1252" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
 
----- Original Message -----=20
From: claire=20 diver
Cc: adelenegreene@yahoo.co.uk = ; bron@ireland.com ; fclarke@novavision.com ; james_mac_donncha@hotmail.c= om ;=20 kkenny007@hotmail.com ; colllouise@hotmail.com ; Mark.Hedderman@custom= housegroup.com=20 ; paraic_de_paor@hotmail.com= ; roisinod62@hotmail.com ; sarahlowther@hotmail.com ; = mucser69@yahoo.com=20 ; tanya003@gofree.indigo.ie =
Sent: Monday, May 21, 2001 12:54 PM
Subject: Fwd: FW: FW: FW: These are very good! = jokes




>From: "Sharon Jordan" <sjordan@tassoftware.ie>
= >Reply-To:=20 <sjordan@tassoftware.ie>
= >To:=20 "Carmel. Obrien" <carmel.obrien@ntlworld.ie&g= t;
>CC:=20 "Tim O'Brien" <tobrien@tassoftware.ie>,&nb= sp;  =20 "Olga Craig" 
><ocraig@tassoftware.ie>, = ;  =20 "Lorraine"  <lleahy@tassoftware.ie>, = ;  =20
>"Kathleen Mc Goldrick"  <kmcgoldrick@tassoftware.ie= >,   =20 "Julie Devereux" 
><poolergirl@hotmail.com>,&nb= sp;  =20 "I Daly"  <IDaly@arad.ie>,    = "H=20 Kiernan" 
><hkiernan@tassoftware.ie>,&= nbsp;  =20 "Fiona Hanratty"  <fhanratty@tassoftware.ie>= ,=20
>    "Eoghan Kiernan"  <ekiernan@tassoftware.ie>,&= nbsp;  =20 "Dward" 
><dward@tassoftware.ie>, &= nbsp; =20 "Claire Diver"  <claire_diver@hotmail.com>=
>Subject:=20 FW: FW: FW: These are very good! jokes
>Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 = 12:44:35=20 +0100
>
>
>
>-----Original = Message-----
>From:=20 Hunt, Alan (Dublin) [mailto:HuntAla@exchange.ie.ml.com]
>Sent: 21 = May 2001=20 12:23
>To: 'mgunning@invesco.ie'; 'declanw@access.com.au'; 'ollieh@indigo.ie';
>'pmcnif= f@tassoftware.ie';=20 'sjordan@tassoftware.ie'
= >Subject:=20 FW: FW: FW: These are very good! jokes
>
>
>
> = >=20 >Subject: Fwd:FW: FW: These are very good! (fwd)
> > = >
>=20 > > >
> > > >A small boy walks into his mother's = room=20 and catches
> > > > her topless. "Mommy, mommy, what are = those?"=20 he says
> > > >pointing to her breasts.
> > > = >=20 >> >
> > > > >> > "Well, son," she = says. These=20 are ballons, and
> > > >when
> > > > = >> >=20 you die, they inflate and float you up to
> > > = >heaven."
>=20 > > > >> >
> > > > >> > = Incredibly, he=20 appears to believe this
> > > >explanation
> > = > >=20 >> > and goes off quite satisfied.
> > > > = >>=20 >
> > > > >> > Two days later. While his = mother is=20 making tea,
> > > >he
> > > > >> = > rushes=20 into the kitchen.
> > > > >> > "Mommy, mommy, = Aunt Eliza=20 is dying!!"
> > > > >> >
> > > > = >>=20 > "What do you mean?" asks his mother.
> > > > = >>=20 >
> > > > >> > "Well, she's out in the garden = shed,=20 lying on the
> > > > >> > floor. Both of her = ballons are=20 out, Dad's blowing
> > > >them up, and she
> > = >=20 >keeps
> > > > >> > yelling, 'GOD, I'm = coming! GOD=20 I'm coming!'"
> > >=20 >*************************************************
> > > = >=20 > >
> > > >A mother and young son were flying = Aer
>=20 > > > > Lingus.
> > > > > > The son,who = had=20 been
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> looking out the plane's
> > > > > = window,
>=20 > > > > > turned to his mother
> > > > = > >=20 and
> > > > > >
> > > > > >=20 said
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> "Mom ... If big dogs have
> > > > > = baby
> >=20 > > > > dogs and big cats have
> > > > > = >=20 baby
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> cats, why don't
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> big planes have baby
> > > > = >=20 planes?"
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> Stumped for an answer the
> > > > >=20 mother
> > > > > > suggested to her son
> = > >=20 > > > that
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > he
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> ask the
> > > > > >
> > > = >=20 > > > > >> stewardess.
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> The boy = promptly got=20 out
> > > > > of his
> > > > > > = seat and=20 wandered back
> > > > > > to
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > the
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> service = area.
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 "Excuse me" the boy said
> > > > > to the
> > = >=20 > > > stewardess. "If big
> > > > > > = dogs
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > have
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> baby = dogs=20 and
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> big cats have baby cats,
> > > > > = why
> >=20 > > > > don't big planes have
> > > > > = >=20 baby
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> planes?"
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > > > >> "Did your mother tell you
> > > > = > to=20 ask
> > > > > > me that?" "Yes" He
> > = > >=20 > > said
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> nodding his head.
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> She whispered in the = boy's
>=20 > > > > ear,
> > > > > > "Tell your = mother=20 it's
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 because
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> Aer Lingus
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> always pulls out on time."
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >>
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > >
> > >
>=20 >---------------------------------------------------------------------= --
>=20 > >-
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 > > >> ----
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >>
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> ---
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >>
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >>
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >> The parish = priest=20 needs
> > > > > his house
> > > > > = >=20 painted so he offers
> > > > > > the
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > job
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> to one of = his
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 altar boys. The first day
> > > > > the kid
> = > >=20 > > > paints the entire
> > > > > > = inside
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > of
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> the=20 house,
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 > >> he's sweating like hell
> > > > > = but
>=20 > > > > > eventually gets it
> > > > > = >=20 finished.
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> The priest commends him on
> > > > > = the
>=20 > > > > > work and with a
> > > > > = >=20 flourish
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 hands
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 > >> him 50p. The
> > > > > >
> > = >=20 > > > > > >> boy looks at the coin and
> > = >=20 > > says to
> > > > > > the priest = "Thanks
>=20 > > > > > very
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > much
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > > > >> Father,
> > > > > >
> = >=20 > > > > > > >> you're a virgin".
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >> The priest = is a=20 bit
> > > > > startled but
> > > > > = >=20 makes no remark. Next
> > > > > > day
> > = >=20 > > >
> > > > > > the
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> boy has = to
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >> = paint=20 the outside of the
> > > > > house;
> > > = >=20 > > it's a really hot day
> > > > > > = and
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > he
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> just = manages=20 to
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> finish the job without
> > > > > >=20 collapsing.
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 > > >> The priest looks at the
> > > > > = job=20 and
> > > > > > this time gives the
> > = > >=20 > > lad a
> > > > > >
> > > > = >=20 > > pound
> > > > > >
> > > > = >=20 > > > >> coin. Once
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> again the lad looks at = the
> >=20 > > > coin
> > > > > > and says "Thanks=20 very
> > > > > > much
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> Father,you=20 really
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 > >> are a virgin".
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> At this stage the priest
> > = >=20 > > decides
> > > > > > to take = action.
> >=20 > > > > "Tommy,"
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > he
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > > > >> says,"that's
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> twice you called me = a
> >=20 > > > virgin. Do
> > > > > > you have any=20 idea
> > > > > > what
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > the
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> word = means?".
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 "Yes" says the brat,"a
> > > > > tight
> > = > >=20 > > c*nt"
> > > > > >
> > > > = >=20 > > > >>
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >>
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >>
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > >
> > >=20 >*******************************************************
> > = >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 Little Johnny in Love
> > > > > >
> > > = >=20 > > > > >> The pretty teacher was
> > > = > >=20 concerned
> > > > > > with one of her
> > = >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >>=20 eleven-year-old students.
> > > > > >
> > = >=20 > > > > > >> Taking him aside after
> > = > >=20 > class one
> > > > > > day,she asked,
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> = "Little=20 Johnny, why has
> > > > > your
> > > > = >=20 > school work been so poor
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > lately?"
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> "I'm in love," the boy
> > > = > >=20 replied.
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> Holding back an urge to
> > > > > = smile,
>=20 > > > > > she asked, "With whom?"
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> "With YOU!" he=20 said.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 > >> "But Johnny," she said
> > > > > = gently,
>=20 > > > > > "don't you see how
> > > > > = >=20 silly
> > > > > >
> > > > > >=20 that
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> is? It's true
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> that I would like a
> > > > = >=20 husband of my
> > > > > > own someday. But = I
> >=20 > > > > don't
> > > > > >
> > = >=20 > > > > want
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> a child."
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> "Oh, don't worry," the = boy
>=20 > > > > said
> > > > > > reassuringly,=20 "I'll
> > > > > > use a
> > > > > = >
> > > > > > > > >> = rubber!"
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > >=20 >>
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >>
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > >
> > > > = >
> >=20 > = >***************************************************************
&g= t;=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 ***
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >>
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >>
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> The makers of Fairy Liquid
> > > > = >=20 are
> > > > > > set to release a new
> > = > >=20 > > advert
> > > > > >
> > > > = >=20 > > > >> based in Dublin's
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> Northside. A = similar=20 ad
> > > > > will run
> > > > > > = in=20 Limerick.
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> It goes like this:
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> Little Boy: "Mammy why = are
> >=20 > > > your
> > > > > > hands so = soft"?
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 Mother: "Because I'm
> > > > > twelve"
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >>
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > >
> > >=20 >************************************************************
> = >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > >=20 >>
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >>
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> Sons
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >>
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> Four men went golfing one
> > = >=20 > > day.
> > > > > > Three of them headed = to
>=20 > > > > > the
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> first tee and the
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> fourth went = into=20 the
> > > > > clubhouse to
> > > > > = >=20 make some calls. The
> > > > > >
> > > = >=20 > > three
> > > > > >
> > > > = >=20 > > > >> men started
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> talking, bragging = about
> >=20 > > > their
> > > > > > sons.The first man = told
> > > > > > the
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> others,
> = >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >> = "My son=20 is a homebuilder
> > > > > and he
> > > = > >=20 > is so successful that
> > > > > > he
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > gave
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > a
> > > > > = >
> > > > > > > > >> friend a = new
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 home for free."
> > > > > >
> > > > = >=20 > > > >> The second man said, "My
> > > > = > son=20 was
> > > > > > a car salesman and
> > = > >=20 > > now he
> > > > > >
> > > > = >=20 > > owns
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> a multi-line
> > > > > >
> = >=20 > > > > > > >> dealership. He's so
> > = >=20 > > successful
> > > > > > that he gave a = friend=20 a
> > > > > > new
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> Mercedes
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> convertible,=20 fully
> > > > > loaded."
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> The third man = bragged,=20 "My
> > > > > son is
> > > > > > = a=20 stockbroker and
> > > > > > he's
> > > = >=20 > >
> > > > > > doing
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> so well = that
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >> he=20 gave his friend an
> > > > > entire
> > > = >=20 > > stock portfolio."
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> The fourth man joined them
> = > >=20 > > on the
> > > > > > tee after a = few
> >=20 > > > > minutes.
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> The first man said, "We
> > = > >=20 > were just
> > > > > > talking about = our
> >=20 > > > > sons.
> > > > > >
> > = >=20 > > > How
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > > > >> is yours
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> doing?"
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> The fourth man=20 replied,
> > > > > "Well, my
> > > > = > >=20 son is gay and
> > > > > > dances in
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > a
> > > > = >
>=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> gay = bar.=20 I'm
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> not totally thrilled about
> > > > > = the
> >=20 > > > > dancing job, but he
> > > > > > = must=20 be
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> doing good. His
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> last three boyfriends gave
> > = > >=20 > him a
> > > > > > house, a brand new
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > Mercedes,
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >> and a=20 stock
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 > >> portfolio.
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >>
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >>
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >>
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 >
> > >=20 >**************************************************************
>= ; >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > >=20 >>
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >>
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> There was this couple that
> > > > = >=20 was
> > > > > > married for 20 years,
> > = >=20 > > > and
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > every
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 > > >> time they had
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> s*x the husband always
> = > >=20 > > insisted
> > > > > > on shutting off = the
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > = lights.
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >> = Well,=20 after 20
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> years the wife felt this
> > > > > = was
>=20 > > > > > stupid. She figured she
> > > > = >=20 > would
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 > > >> break him out of
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> the crazy habit. So = one
> >=20 > > > night,
> > > > > > while they were = in=20 the
> > > > > >
> > > > > >=20 middle
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 of
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> doing it,
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > > > >> she turned on the lights.
> > > > = >=20 She
> > > > > > looked down and saw her
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > husband
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >> was = holding=20 a
> > > > > >
> > > > > > > = >=20 >> dildo. She got really
> > > > > = upset.
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >> = "You=20 impotent b*stard,"
> > > > > she
> > > = > >=20 > screamed at him, "how
> > > > > > = could
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > you be
> > = >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> lying = to=20 me
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> all of these years? You
> > > > > = better
> >=20 > > > > explain yourself!"
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> The husband looks = her
> >=20 > > > straight in
> > > > > > the eyes and = says,
> > > > > >
> > > > > >=20 calmly,
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> "I'll explain
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> the dildo.......If you can
> = > >=20 > > > explain our three kids."
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >>
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >>
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >>
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > >
> > >=20 >********************************************************
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >> One=20 day Jane met Tarzan in
> > > > > the
> > > = >=20 > > jungle. She was very
> > > > > >
> = >=20 > > > > attracted
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> to him and,
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> during her = questions=20 about
> > > > > his
> > > > > > = life, she=20 asked him how
> > > > > > he
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> managed for=20 s*x.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> "What's that?" he asked.
> > > > > = She
> >=20 > > > > explained to him what s*x
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > was,
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > and
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> he = said,
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >>=20 "Oh,Tarzan use hole in
> > > > > trunk of
> > = >=20 > > > tree."
> > > > > >
> > > = >=20 > > > > >> Horrified, she said,
> > > > = >=20 "Tarzan you
> > > > > > have that all = wrong!
> >=20 > > > > I
> > > > > >
> > > = >=20 > > will
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> show you how to
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> do it properly." She took
> = >=20 > > > off her
> > > > > > clothes, lay = down=20 on
> > > > > > the
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> ground, and
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >> spread her = legs=20 wide.
> > > > > "Here," she
> > > > = > >=20 said, pointing, "You
> > > > > >
> > > = >=20 > > must
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> put it in
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> here."
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> Tarzan removed=20 his
> > > > > loincloth,
> > > > > = >=20 stepped closer and then
> > > > > > gave
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > her
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> an = almighty
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 kick in the crotch. Jane
> > > > > rolled
> > = >=20 > > > around in agony.
> > > > > >
> = >=20 > > > > Eventually
> > > > > >
> = >=20 > > > > > she
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> managed to
> > > > > = >
> > > > > > > > >> gasp, "Why the = hell=20 did
> > > > > you do
> > > > > >=20 that?"
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 > >> "Tarzan check for bees!"
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >>
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >>
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >>
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > >
> > >=20 >***************************************************************
&g= t; >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >>=20 *
> > > > > >
> > > > > > > = >=20 >>
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >>
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> 10 Times Bigger
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> The 10th grade teacher
> = > >=20 > > asks
> > > > > > Jessica:
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >> "What part = of the=20 human
> > > > > body
> > > > > >=20 increases to 10 times
> > > > > > it's
> > = >=20 > > >
> > > > > > normal
> > > = >=20 > >
> > > > > > > > >> size = when
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 excited?"
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> Jessica responds: "That's
> > > > > > = disgusting!
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 > > >> I don't have to answer
> > > > >=20 that
> > > > > > question!" So the teacher
> = >=20 > > > > asks
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> little Johnny,
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> who = responds:
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 "That's easy...the pupil
> > > > > of the
> > = >=20 > > > eye." "That's correct,
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > Johnny.
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> Very good!"
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> And turning to=20 Jessica,
> > > > > she says:
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> "I've three = things to=20 say
> > > > > to you,
> > > > > > = young=20 lady... first,
> > > > > > you
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> didn't do = your
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 homework; second, you have
> > > > > a
> > = > >=20 > > dirty mind; and third,
> > > > > > = you're
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > in
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> for a = big
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> disappointment!"
> > > > > >
> > = >=20 > > > > > >>
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >>
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >>
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > >
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > >
> > >=20 >***************************************************************
&g= t; >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >>=20 ***
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >>
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >>
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> Weighed???
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > > >> Joe took his blind date to
> = > >=20 > > the
> > > > > > carnival. "What = would
>=20 > > > > > you
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > like
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > > > >> to do first,
> > > > > = >
>=20 > > > > > > > >> Kim?" asked Joe. "I = want
>=20 > > > > to get
> > > > > > weighed," = she=20 said.
> > > > > > They
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > ambled
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> over to = the
>=20 > > > > >
> > > > > > > > = >>=20 weight guesser. He guessed
> > > > > 120
> > = >=20 > > > pounds.
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> She got on the scale; it
> > > = >=20 > read 117
> > > > > > and she won a
> = > >=20 > > > prize.b
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > Next
> > > > > >
> > > > = > >=20 > > >> the couple went
> > > > > = >
> >=20 > > > > > > >> on the ferris wheel.
> > = >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> When = the ride=20 was over,
> > > > > Joe again
> > > > = > >=20 asked Kim what she
> > > > > > would
> > = > >=20 > >
> > > > > > > like
> > > = > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> to do. = "I
> >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > > >> = want to=20 get weighed," she
> > > > > said.
> > > = > >=20 > Back to the weight
> > > > > > guesser
> = >=20 > > > >
> > > > > > > they
> = > >=20 > > >
> > > > > > > > >> went. = Since
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = >=20 > >> they had been there
> > > > > before, = he
>=20 > > > > > guessed her correct
> > > > > = >=20 weight,
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 and
> > > > > >
> > > > > > = > >=20 >> Joe lost his
> > > > > >
> > > = >=20 > > > > >> dollar. The couple walked
> > > = >=20 > around
> > > > > > the carnival and
> = > >=20 > > > again he
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> asked where to
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> next. "I want = to=20 get
> > > > > weighed,"
> > > > > = > she=20 responded. By this
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > time,
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 > Joe
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> figured she
> > > > > >
> > = >=20 > > > > > >> was really weird and took
> > = >=20 > > her
> > > > > > home early, dropping = her
>=20 > > > > > off
> > > > > >
> = > >=20 > > > > with
> > > > > >
> > = > >=20 > > > > >> a handshake.
> > > > >=20 >
> > > > > > > > >> Her roommate, = Laura,=20 asked
> > > > > her
> > > > > > = about the=20 blind date,
> > > > > >
> > > > > = >=20 "How'd it
> > > > > >
> > > > > = > >=20 > >> go?"
> > > > > >
> > > = > >=20 > > > >> Kim responded, "Oh, Waura,
> > > = > >=20 it was
> > > > > > wousy."
> > > > = >=20 >
> > > > > >
> > > >
> = >=20 >
> >
> >=20
>_________________________________________________________________= ________
>=20 > Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at=20
>http://www.hotmail.com.
>=20 >
>

_____________________________________________________= ____________________
Get=20 Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com.

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